I have dreams of being big. dreams of being being extraordinary. of making a huge different in this world and leaving my mark. dreams of falling in love and having 2 children. of making music that changes peoples lives. of owning a home on the beach and waking to nothing but the sound of the sea. of becoming an expert on the piano and guitar so every time my heart sings i can outwardly express it.
I have big dreams and I am scared that they won’t be fulfilled. That i will wake at 40 and not know how i got there and why i didnt do anything to stop it. If i get really honest with myself and take a good look im not sure that im heading in that direction. Some days are on track and other days I am doing everything (subconsciously) to make that dream never reach existence.
And I have moments where i think whats the point of it all, then moments when i think it will all fall into my lap, moment where i feel super motivated, and moments where I just can’t be bothered. But as each day goes by, thats another day I could be taking actions to living the life i want. And so i take a good look and ask myself… have i practised my instrunments today, did i exersize, did i stick to my budget, did i stand up for myself in a particular relationship, did i write a song, did i call a friend to say hello.
Torn between wanting a great lift and wondering whether it will be that great or if im just living in fantasy and shouldnt waste my time.
This moment can fly away in seconds, into the distance, and then here comes another one before it flies away too.
The future is anything i want it to be, now i need to choose wisely.